Marriage the way they are raised to

Marriage is the union of man and woman to create a family. It is one ofthe most important aspects of human life as the evolution of man in the modernsociety ranging from the birth of children to the way they are raised to beresponsible adults is fundamentally as a result of marriage. However marriageis not always a happy or fruitful union, sometimes it may turn out bizarre andthe parties may not agree on certain issues in their marriage life which mayeventually lead to separation.

This separation has come to be known as divorce.Divorce may legally be defined as the legal separation of man and wife that ismade effective by the judgment of a court by either totally dissolving themarriage relation or suspending its effects so far as concerning the cohabitationof the parties.1 in the followingparagraphs of this exquisite piece of writing, I will focus on some of thetypes of divorce, the Rwandan law perspective and the international perspectiveon divorce, some of the consequences of divorce and how divorce conflicts canbe resolved. TYPESOF DIVORCE Divorce has very many types andthe following are some of those types of divorce; NO-FAULT DIVORCEIn this type of divorce, theseparation is not based on the fault made buy one of the parties. The reasonsfor acquiring the divorce may be as simple as incompatibility and simpledifferences between the spouses. The spouses simply agree on separating and itdoes not necessitate the spouses to show the cause of their divorce. UNCONTESTED DIVORCEThis is the kind of divorcewhereby the spouses reach an agreement to legally end the marriage. They also agreeon the issues regarding financial issues, division of property and children.

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 SIMPLIFIED DIVORCE This kind of divorce usuallytakes place in marriages that are of short duration where there are no childrenand the property to be divided between the spouses is very few.LIMITED DIVORCEThis type of divorce is more likelegal separation whereby the spouses live separately and cannot have sexualrelations. It gives them time to reach an agreement on division of property,child custody and alimony.2 GENERAL CAUSES OFDIVORCE1. InfidelityExtra-marital affairs areresponsible for the breakdown of most marriages that end in divorce. The reasons why people cheat aren’tas cut and dry as our anger may lead us to believe. Anger and resentment arecommon underlying reasons for cheating, along with differences in sexualappetite and lack of emotional intimacy. Infidelityoften begins as a seemingly innocent friendship, says cheating expert RuthHouston.

“It starts as an emotional affair which later becomes a physicalaffair”.2. MoneyMoney makes people funny, or sothe saying goes, and it’s true. Everything from different spending habitsand financial goals to one spouse makingconsiderably more money than the other, causing a power struggle can strain amarriage to the breaking point. “Money really touches everything.

It impactspeople’s lives,” said Emmet Burns, brand marketing director for SunTrust.Clearly, money and stress do seem to go hand in hand for many couples.3.

Lack of communicationCommunication is crucial inmarriage and not being able to communicate effectively quickly leads toresentment and frustration for both, impacting all aspects of a marriage. Onthe other hand, good communication is the foundation of a strong marriage. Yelling at your spouse, not talking enough throughout the day,making nasty comments to express yourself are all unhealthy methods ofcommunication that need to be ditched in a marriage. Practicing mindfulcommunication, to change age-old marriage mistakes, can be hard but it’s wellworth the effort to improve and save your relationship.4. Constant arguingFrom bickering about chores toarguing about the kids; incessant arguing kills many relationships. Couples who seem to keep having the same argument over againoften do so because they feel they’re not being heard or appreciated. Many findit hard to see the other person’s point of view, which leads to a lot ofarguments without ever coming to a resolution.

5. Weight gainIt may seem awfully superficialor unfair, but weight gain is a common reason for divorce. In some cases asignificant amount of weight gain causes the other spouse to become lessphysically attracted while for others, weight gain takes a toll on theirself-esteem, which trickles into issues with intimacy.6. Unrealistic expectationsIt’s easy to go into a marriagewith lofty expectations; expecting your spouse and themarriage to live up to your image of what they should be. These expectationscan put a lot of strain on the other person, leaving you feeling let down andsetting your spouse up for failure.3 RWANDANPERSPECTIVE ON DIVORCEThe law has also simplified procedures for divorce toprevent gender-based violence, according to officials.

“The procedures for divorce were simplified. This is toprevent a spouse from being harmed by the other while waiting for the court todecide on the matter,” said Jean Pierre Kayitare, the deputy attorney-generalin charge of legislative drafting services at the Ministry of Justice.4GROUNDSFOR DIVORCEArticle218: Grounds for divorce Any of the spouses may apply for divorce on one of thefollowing grounds: 1° adultery; 2° desertion for a period of at least twelve(12) consecutive months; 3° conviction for an offense severely tainting thehonour; 4° refusal to provide for the household needs; 5° excess, abuse orserious insults by one towards another; 6° gender based violence; 7° de factoseparation for a period of at least two (2) years; 8° non-cohabitation for morethan twelve consecutive (12) months from the day of celebration of marriage onunjustifiable.1 https://thelawdictionary.org/divorce/2 https://www.liveabout.com/types-of-divorce-1103300 3 https://www.marriage.com/advice/divorce/10-most-common-reasons-for-divorce/4http://www.newtimes.co.rw/section/read/193613/ 

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